Sunday, June 12, 2005

Emotions, Part 1: Anger Leads To Love (Not Hate)

This is just a ramblings that I have been having with myself for some time now, several years in fact.

When a person falls in love with someone, the passion they generate for that someone is great. It can be from a mild "I want to give her flowers, or I want to cook for him" to something so big like "I work hard to get her/him this or that which usually is expensive". Love can make a person focus so much on the passion they feel, that nothing else matters.

Simple example. When a loved one is still trapped in a burning building, the fire seems non-important in the current case. All you know is to get into the house to save the loved one. The focus of the passion is so strong at that time, "to not lose that special loved-one" that only one thing exists in the mind. To save, risking yourself.... heck, you won't even know you're risking yourself due to that energy.

Now, let's go to anger. I will give a very simple example that has happened to a friend. He is with his loved-one. He's driving, the loved-one beside him on the passenger seat. They're going for a nice lunch together. The focus on LOVE is not that strong at that time, because he's contented with the current feeling of spending time together.

Suddenly... a modified kancil speeds up behind him, tailgate for a few seconds, flashes him and then cuts him on the left. He's driving a manual, also modified Alfa Romeo. What happens next. Due to ego, he was angered a little that a car tailgate him, the anger rose when the car flashed at him, and lastly the car cut him from the left! All the anger is due to ego.

Helicopter view: An Alfa Romeo chasing a Kancil on PLUS highway from KL to Port Dickson, when all he wanted to go was to Sepang. His passion and focus at that point of time is so strong it can be compared to love! Lunch is secondary, loved one sitting quiet and worried beside him is secondary, what must be done must be done, that is to cut the Kancil again to show he's superior. After that, the passion will die down and the focus is back to his loved one.

As ridiculous as this may sound, it happens to nearly ALL Malaysian drivers between the age of 18 to 40. Most of those above 40, who have learned patience and has total control over his ego will not even give a hoot about the kancil cutting to his left. Some between 30 to 40 will just make a small issue for about 5 minutes before the kancil gets out of his mind. But, between 18 to 30, it can haunt him into the night, some even for days, if he cannot chase the kancil.

Why lah let people steal your current emotional peace and contentment? How can we be as patience and as humble in our ego to just let these emotion-thief not get what they want? I guess it's all a question of ego, time and patience.

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