Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Who Is Shanna Hiel?

This post is in the category of diary, as it is a personal experience I had.

One of many overdue post I have yet to write is about my experience in the hospital during my wife's delivery which takes about 4 days and 3 nights. What I experienced I would consider it a "memory dream", that is, every night I will dream of other people's memories. These dreams are very not related to me, therefore I am seeing things through the eyes of others. Without fail, at least three memory dreams I had per night for two nights there.

Yesterday's dream however, is a mixture of fantasy and reality. The dream seems so real because it includes everyone in my current life, from my wife to my baby, to my mother and one of my siblings. Maybe the dream happened due to our (my wife's and I) anticipation of Flight Plan, but then again, I do not think about it at all. Nevertheless, this post will just account the details of the dream.

My wife and I are actually married in 1998. Go figure. I was just 19 then. Current time is now, 2005. We actually had a daughter who was taken from us, maybe when she was a baby or toddler, who knows. At this current time, we have already accepted the lost of our daughter. Here's where 'fantasy' comes in.

We are staying in a house. Funnily, we have never been able to open one single room in the house, which is actually the common toilet of the second floor. We can never remember when it was opened last. We are also very friendly with our neighbours. I think we have about three or four neighbours who are very close to us, and comes in and out of our house as if they're part of the family, and we do the same to their house. One neighbour was a huge man. I never liked him. He is the one I suspected who took our daughter.

This 2nd floor common toilet have been tried to be opened before, so that we can change the door since we can't find the key, but nothing can break the door. Even a hammer or axe have been tried but it cant dent the door in any way. The only way I guess, is to find the key for it, and the key looks like those steering wheel / computer lock kinda key.

It just happened that one day the huge neighbour passed away. Before he died, he asked me "You still think that I took your daughter?!". That got me remembering that we once had a daughter. And from my thinking, if he is currently having our daughter, it will be a matter of time before she will be out of drink or food if he has her locked up somewhere. So began a frantic search in his house for some kinda key.

One the fourth day of his death, I got frustrated that I broke planks by planks of his personal cupboard, and I did find a key attached by glue to the bottom of the cupboard. Rushed back to my house with the key and tried it on the toilet door. As you would also expect, the key worked. Found our daughter turned face down in the bathtub filled with water up to about 5 inches.

I carried her out while shouting "ambulance" many times. This part was so real. Neighbours and their children came out and the ambulance did come. I remembered holding her in while towel, and she has just stopped shivering but still unconscious. Then the dream jumped forward to when she's back home. While looking at her playing on her own, I asked my wife "How old is she now?" and my wife said "Born in 1998, what do you think?" and I mentioned "We married in 1998, means she's born in 1999 isn't it?".

Her name, as my wife and I recall is Shanna Hiel. I totally cannot describe her face, but to describe her in a way that I can, she has straight long hair right below the shoulders. Rather thin as how a 6 years old can be. Already potty trained as she did tell us how she learned it. Rather talkative and can speak in both english and malay. Seems to not hold a grudge on the huge neighbour as she thought he was her very protective father. She did show a swollen right jaw where he hit her. She was treated well, fed well, except that she's locked up to hide from us.

For me, I actually wished the neighbour was still alive so that I can kill(?!?) him. She readily accept us as her parents once more and said that she was too young to even remember. Yeah, and us being parents have somewhat already let her go from memory?!? She was given a tour of our baby's crib and toys. She particularly liked the musical twirling toy that sits on top of the crib. She enjoys playing with her younger brother.

I woke up this morning, seeing my baby sleeping next to me. It was surreal. I'm back in this time, but the dream was so vivid as it includes everyone else close to me instead of strangers. So, who is this Shanna Hiel really?! And why to such a detail on dreams? Most people forgets their dream the moment they wake up, or remember up to 30% of their dreams. I have had remembered dreams too, but never to such a detail. If you dream, there is no sound or voice, all sounds and voices comes telepathically (but in the dream you think you actually say or heard sounds lah). :P

Anyway, Shanna Hiel, whoever you are, hope you are happy with your family.


Update: My wife just asked me if I had a nightmare as I was crying in my sleep at about 6:00am plus. I guess that was the shouting for ambulance part (then again, people say full dreams happen in just 10-20 seconds) as I was most emotionally strickened then. Well, case will remain closed.

Friday, September 23, 2005

My Cheese Is Moved

This would be belong in the category of Rant, except that I have yet to do any categorizing on my posts.

For those who have read the book Who Moved My Cheese, you would know what I'm talking about. For those who have not, would not know what I'm talking about, obviously. :P Okay, in layman terms, I am now given a different job scope (actually, same, but more) and a change of scenery. Beginning Monday, I am no longer reporting to HQ where all my directors are, but instead reporting to the site office. Sounds good no? Not really. A simple list below would share what I might enjoy and not enjoy having to shift office.

My Gains
1. In my previous office, every three staff will be sitting in front of managers, therefore the manager will be able to see exactly what the staff does on the computer. I find this very de-motivating as I cannot work with the Hawthorne effect. I work better given the privacy to make my calls, do my work, without thinking that someone's criticising what I'm doing.
2. Closer to home. From the previous 30 minutes journey to work, and 45 minutes journey from work, now it will be a 15 minutes to and from work.
3. Buying DVD is a walking distance.
4. Less travelling for viewings of office spaces, since my site office is the main office I am trying to beef up occupancy. Save on petrol going to and from HQ to site office.
5. Free parking. At HQ, parking needs to be paid about RM100 per month, here, it's free since we're the landlord's management team. I do hope they don't take away my parking allowance though.
In Summary - I gain in finance (if my allowances remain intact) and in empowerment.


My Losses
1. HQ was a lot closer to KFC, McDonalds, Giant, RHB Bank, BCB Bank and Post Office. That's a all-in place for food, banking and groceries. Now, nearby banks are those I'm not an account holder of. It'll be more difficult to do my banking. Food places, sigh... seriously it'll be mamak food all the time.
2. Freakin' 45 minutes on my clock per day!! This one I am not happy about at all. I have to come in 15 minutes earlier and leave 30 minutes later as compared to HQ.
3. Add one more job scope, which is to manage a service office. I just hope the tenants are not those crazy ones who pick at the smallest thing.
4. Colleagues for lunch. Lunches with four other male colleagues will end up with a lot of knowledge sharing about real estate business and current trends. But now it'll be lunch with one male colleague who is an accountant (which I am not experienced in at all) OR one male friend who's a lawyer, OR ta-pau food and eat in office!! I really don't see myself eating with the two female admin staff.
5. Previously it was alternate Saturday working time. Now it'll have to be two working Saturdays, followed by one non-working Saturday, and then repeat.


Double-Edged
1. I had one marketing staff to help me in HQ. Now, I have TWO admin staff to help me in site office. I think I prefer marketing staff than admin staff eventhough there's two of them.We'll see how this goes.
2. Time-management. Running three bottom-line responsibilities is going to be a very scary thing. Money need to flow into the service office. Money need to flow into the building's office. And Money need to flow into my agency department (from deals on other office buildings). Putting a positive face for this one. The first will be the most challenging since it's the most expensive in terms of price per square feet.


In Conclusion
I have not made up my mind which job would satisfy me greater in the long run. If I deliver, then it's very transparent that it's my job because my ex-marketing staff has now been absorbed into another department. At least my bosses will know who to credit. If I fail to deliver, I have a lot to answer. But seriously, I do HATE the Saturday set-up. Will have a word to my boss on this issue. Hehe... the game begins.


Add-on: It's a good sign that today I am at 75% chance of closing a deal that will bring in at least RM15,000 into my company. More to come. Pray for me.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Of Supply And Demand: Glitters And Gold

This is a post based on small read-up, research and analysis that I have done before, as well as my own opinion from observations of the market, and the consumers. But I believe that I am more than 50% correct in my views.

Things of beauty have always been a consumer luring product, be it a diamond ring, cell phonesor cars. Truth be told, I purchase products on logic reasons (usage) more than attractiveness of the products, but here I will talk purely on the latter. Also, on the possibility of selling back the products for cash. Of course we know that cars prices drop about 20% - 30% in price the moment its bought from the manufacturer, but we'll talk on glitters and gold.


GOLD














Gold is an investment product. It is a controlled item. I'm talking about gold that's made of 99.9% gold and 0.01% urea. Kidding! I have totally no idea what the other 0.01% is made of. Anyway, if you purchase gold bracelet, you're actually paying for the real price of gold, plus the labour cost of handywork, shipping cost and trading cost. When you sell back the bracelet in dire times, you're selling back the real price of gold, or lesser depending on demand. What most consumers usually fail to request is the authenticity of the gold being 99.9%.

Most Malaysians in the 80s and early 90s are quite used to those aunties bringing around gold products in bags and selling it to women who wants to look rich. That's where that Mami Jarum come in. I have a very big doubt that it's at least 50% gold, if not just a gold plated product. Gold is anyone's market.


CRYSTAL















Crystal IS NOT an investment product. At least it won't be for the next 200 years or even 500 years because supply is greatly higher than demand. Worst of all, since perfect crystal can now be manufactured, there really is no value in crystal. That said, I deem it as a decorative product. Stones like the amethyst and onyx are from the earth, and I really have not much say on the ability for industries to create these stones, so we'll just stick to pure crystals.

Crystal is purely a mixture of silica and lead. That means, your crystal products is made from sand, or glass and lead. Why people buy crystal is because it reflects light better than glass and that the more lead there is in crystals, the more difficult it is to break into pieces. Pure crystals are about 2% lead.

Swarovski crystals have a higher carbon composite that makes them chip and not break. Swarovski crystals command a very high price than the common Jaya Jusco crystal vase because of handiwork, perfect mixture of silica and lead in its per inch square and that it's brand is highly recognised, same like Hello Kitty.

For consumers, I'd really suggest that crystals are used purely for decorative purposes, and never to purchase for future reselling. Don't think of "It's really nice. I'd like to keep it, and if there's financial problems in the future, I can sell it off." Pawn shops will hardly accept crystal products. Crystal is a seller's market, not consumers.


GLASS


















Glass has no value. Purely for decorative purpose that 'must not' be touched. That is, if a glass product is made so nicely and it placed for decoration, we'd have to be sure not to have children play nearby. It can break so easily, and for adults who wishes to view the handiwork of glass products, they will leave fingerprints. Glass is a very common consumer's item, therefore it's purely a seller's market. Crap, I should not even talk about glass since it's a superbly common item.


DIAMOND













It is said that a diamond is the hardest material in the world. Since only diamond can cut diamond, I guess it is,... but since I did not conduct and read-up on the whether it's true or not, I shall just believe the rumour, coz' this is about supply and demand.

Diamond, though it can be sold to jewellers or pawn shops, its value will decrease dramatically. The only way a diamond's value will increase if you buy a large diamond to cut them into smaller pieces and sell them at a higher price, just as Secret Recipe sells higher per piece than a whole cake. Diamond has a high supply and high demand. Easily, as much as there are marriages in a year, that's nearly as much diamonds sold in the same year. Diamonds are also bought during chinese new years and special occasions.

Due to that, it's largely a seller's market, not a consumer market. To sell a diamond, it will be more than 30% decrease in price to sell back to jewellers, and up to 70% decrease in price to pawn shops. Why?? Easy.... all men would want to buy diamond rings/bracelet/nose ring/tongue ring/tiara from respectable jewellers such as Tiffany & Co, Kedai Emas Gagal, Poh Kong, etc... and not from pawn shops or friends.

Guy: Will you marry me?
Girl: Wow, is this a diamond ring???
Guy: Yes, it is!
Girl: From Tiffany & Co?
Guy: No, I bought from my friend Jack, who I dunno bought from where.

Not to condemn girls in general, but not many girls will actually be elated to receive a diamond that was bought at a bargain. Therefore, diamond will always be a seller's market. It will be also another 500 years before diamonds can be considered an investment product.

Diamond will remain a product of significance. Wedding ring. 50th Anniversary Necklace. Relationship Bracelet. When the significance run out from break-up or divorce, that's when they get sold.


IN CONCLUSION

To me personally, all that glitters are beauty enhancement. At least 85% of glitters are worn on the body by women. Some wear it for the beauty, some for status and some for prestige. It's greatly common that at big functions people ask about the glitters a woman is wearing, where it came from, the price, all for prestige. At business meetings and appointment, glitters tend to show the current financial status of the woman (or the family, or husband, or boyfriend, whichever). For pure beauty's sake, people will only look from far, and will not question about the make, price or even place of purchase.

Due to that, I think it's better to buy items for beauty at cheap places. Rather than buying earrings (ear stud size) from jewellers, might as well buy from normal shops that sells 25% of the price. For plasticy items, rather than buying from normal non-branded shops, might as well buy from Sinma.













Oh,.... that said, Sinma's product is getting more expensive since their brand is starting to be well-known. Looks like in time-period terms, Sinma beats Mydin, but since they're totally of different industry, I cannot justify this sentence. :)

Now, what's the real purpose of this post!?? Nothing I guess. It just serve as a reminder to me, who used to be quite interested in stone crystals (cut to diamond shapes). They look really nice as they bounce light well, and are great products to be placed behind glass casings, but that's as much as it is. I think I have enough, I should not purchase more eventhough they're sold cheap in Penang's bargain sites. Well, at least I didn't buy diamonds or higher carbonated crystals for decorative purpose. :D

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Things You Learn From A Baby

Having had our newest member of the family for 1 month and 4 days today, there are several things that we can learn from a baby. Among those that I can think up right now are: -

1. Ninja Skills - Stealth
Once the baby goes to sleep, and before the baby plummets into deep sleep, they can easily be awaken by any sound at all. If they were to fall asleep in noisy places, this is not a problem, but in the bedroom, to get out of the bed and to the toilet or kitchen or whatever, you really need to practise your tip-toe skills and sign language between husband and wife. Interesting, and fun.

2. Reading Body Language
Somehow or rather, nearly all my friends I know who have babies says that the probability of babies releasing their pee during a diaper change astounds mathematicians. A pee takes about 10 seconds to complete. A day takes 24 hours or to be detailed is 86400 seconds. Let's say a baby pees once every 30 minutes, that's 10 seconds of pee for every 1800 seconds. We'll give a figure for length of time for a diaper change to 60 seconds. In layman terms, the probability of baby peeing during a diaper change is once every 30 diaper changes. But my friends, for our baby, it's about once every five diaper changes. Only logical reason is that a baby feels 'ahhhhh...' to pee not feeling a soiled diaper. Reading the baby's body on when the baby is gonna release is a skill to be mastered.

3. Understand Japanese-Created Characters Successes
Now we know why Hello Kitty, Doraemon and Sin Chan are a success in Japan and the world! They cute. What makes them cute is that their head size is equivalent or bigger than their body. Same goes for baby! Baby's head is at a 1:1 to their body, while us as adults are about 1:4 of our body, which makes us a lot less cute. :-( But then ah..... we also have Lat cartoon whose head is bigger than his body, however, Lat is not cute coz' of his porcupine hair lah.

4. You realise you have time
Besides doing personal stuff like taking bath, eating dinner and fixed deposit in the toilet, most of the 'home' time is spent with the baby, be it just be nearby to look at at every few seconds, or holding or soothing the baby. Now, how is it that I have time for all of these. It seems like as if I have totally wasted my 'home' time before baby came doing what ah?! I also can't remember liao.

5. He/She ain't heavy, he/she's our baby.
Why is it that carrying a 3kg laptop is quite tiresome to the body, but carrying or holding a 4.5kg baby is fine? Maybe coz' laptop is not flexible enough to mold into your hands while a baby is. Anyhow, baby's weight is totally ignored in the process of cuddling, soothing and the likes. Love conquers all.

6. Doing Things Efficiently And Effectively
With baby's tendency to start crying without a written notice or agenda, doing things like taking a glass of water, or brushing teeth, or switching on the lights and tv have to be done as quickly and as successful as possible, or else you'll end up only halfway before the baby cries to call for you again. Baby keeps us on our highest alertness and sharpens our basic skills.

7. How To Appreciate Your Wife
Besides the common appreciation of pregnancy, labouring and delivering, there's also....i) the separation, whereby the baby sleeps between us and how to sleep with your wifey lar? You will surely miss having your wife like you used to. ii) the time sacrifice, while I'm sleeping and not hearing when baby wakes up, my wife will wake up to sooth him, sacrificing her sleep to ensure my own sleep to go to work. iii) the body sacrifice, coz' when the wife is taking care of baby, there's a high tendency to neglect taking care of herself.


In conclusion, there's a lot of things a baby will teach us, and that's only during the baby's first month. There's more lesson to come from the little one, for sure!

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Why Have I Forsaken Xanga?

I have wanted to move out of Xanga once, and now I really have done it. Why?! Why leave some of my xangian friends behind and move over to some other blog host?? For me, it's really simple.

1. Not User-Friendly Enough
While I have background in IT, at this current time of my life, I have already gotten that 'not bothered to learn something new unless interesting' character. I used to spend countless hours with a Warcraft printout of unit info and damages just to plan a strategy, but those days are over. Back to Xanga issue, I notice that Xanga does not have user-friendly features for me to click or change things on my website, while this one does, and very easily at that to change settings, format or whatever. No offense to Xanga, it's just a matter of user preference.

2. Need To Register To Comment
Lurkers or non-registered Xanga readers would need to register as a Xangian before they can leave any comments on my posts. Being very tired, as all of us are, in keying in information about ourselves again, and then having to think up new password pulak, and all that, I understand why some people (especially KB. :P) does not want to sign up to something new when they are not using it at all. Well, maybe Xanga does allow non-xangian to comment, but like I mentioned in point 1, I am lazy to look around for it.

3. Occasional Site Down
There are several issues where the site does down on certain occasions, and that's the only free time I have to want to post something. So, it somewhat does get on my nerves.

4. Photos need to be taken from another URL
Photos posted on Xanga need to be taken from another URL, unless you are a Xanga Premium subscriber. If you don't have your own photos somewhere else online, then you need to put it up somewhere to link it. This one allows you to upload your photos into its site, therefore saving tons of trouble having to find locating to store files.

That's about it I guess. I mean, though only 4 points, I think they're strong enough to make me pindah rumah. Anyway, I'm not saying Xanga is bad coz' one thing for sure, Adam Carruther (8tv Quickie dude) punya girlfriend is still in Xanga at www.xanga.com/kinkybluefairy. Since she's somewhat one of the popular bloggers in Malaysia, and she's still there, that says that Xanga is not bad at all. Like previously mentioned, it's just my preference. It's not business, it's personal.

I have transferred all my posts from my previous blog host to here, except that I did not bring along comments with me. The flooble (chat screen) will be brought over here in a couple of days. And changes to the layout will also change in a couple of days once I get used to the technicalities of layout management. I wonder if Eric from Casa Impian can help out with my layout designing.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Plain Musings #1

I'm putting #1 up there coz' I believe some time later in my blog life I will have more muses. Okay, I have absolutely no idea how to use that word muse. I think it comes from amuse, or whatever. And since I've seen it many times elsewhere (without taking the effort to find out what it really means and how to use it), I will simply use it as if I know what it means. So, well, here's my first musing.

In my previous post, while talking about Nursery Rhymes, I remembered other rhymes that to my opinion, is either downright cruel (I think I've wrote about this before) or is a terrorist intelligence hidden in a song. The cruel one, which I think I'm repeating myself, is the Three Blind Mice. A line of the lyric reads "She chops their tails off with the carving knife".... wah... hallo, children nursery rhyme talking about mutilation?! Also, while this may sound sensitive, I really find it peculiar for Intelligence saying that they've received reports of terrorist attacks, but to just let them happen. London was just attacked,... and luckily they did not blow up the london bridge. Or else some CIA or FBI or Scotland Yard Intelligence will say "Oh, we've known about it all along. It's been in the London Bridge nursery rhyme." London bridge is falling down, my fair lady. Duh... why make a nursery rhyme about that?! Others are okay like Yankee Doodle, or Pop Goes The Weasel which sounds good.

Lack of Vitamin D daily really brings up your temper. This year I think I have had several days (less than 5) in which I did not get hit by the sun rays as I stayed home from the moment I wake up until I sleep. Being stuck within four walls (or more) really really make me start to be restless. I don't know whether it's the lack of Vitamin D, or the lack of outdoor air, or just because I don't get to exercise my muscles much at all at home, but well, I'm quite sure this happens to a lot of people as well.

For my own personal actions, I find that from a series of actions that we repeat a day (not the unconscious ones like breathing lah!), such as farting, going to toilet, looking at the mirror, looking at the handphone, etc..... my top most repetitive action during the weekend at home is looking at the clock. Nearly every 15-30 minutes!! Why is that? Is it the dread that "Aww... have to go back to work tomorrow", or simply "I need to do something, what's there to look at to update my knowledge? I know! Let's update the current time in my head!". Aishh.... following looking at clock would be,... farting?! Let's see.. I've only done that 8 times today... hahah!! Cacat... no one calculates how many times they fart. It's ridiculous. I guess the other would be getting a drink from the kitchen.

Foodstalls I love are those where I can take my own food, EAT first, and then go to the counter and tell them what I took. Therefore, I can really pile up the meat, such as 3 scoops of sweet&sour fish meats and then at the counter, just need to say "sweet & sour fish". Foodstalls I totally hate are those that they take the food for you, and then when you say "tambah sikit", they add just another two pieces of sliced ladies finger, or three more ikan bilis. Wah-liao, just charge extra lah, give me another scoop. Gosh... let's see, in the past one month, this is the food price to what I usually take. That'll be white rice, fried beef slices, omelette, veggies. Nasi Kandar restaurant - RM6.50. Malay restaurant near my workplace - RM5.50. Maju Junction Mall - RM4.50. Food courts - RM4.00. In my opinion, the Maju Junction one has the best taste. Yeah, Maju Boleh.

Best advert currently is DIGI with Apek. First the scene was P.Ramlee type show where he said something to the likes of "Ya, dapat banyak untuk, boleh top-up prepaid!", then the Apek Idol "Saya rasa, package anda yang terbaik!", then the Apek Football can't really remember the lines, and lastly the AlleyApek "Maa... Sih!". The WORST advert has to be that motorcycle advert with the Malaysian group singing the background. I think the title of the song is Bomb or whatever.... it ends with this dude seeing the motorcycle moving past him and his girl, he stood up, looking all excited, and removed his glasses in as-if-gaya-lah way. Wah... really really bad advert man! Best motorcycle advert is where the indian guy was happy that girls were looking at his bike, and when one mat salleh was looking at it from behind, he drove away.

A cousin of mine used to recite "Aku Megah. Aku Gagah. Aku Makan Gajah." I think he would have forgotten this by now. That was in 1989. Another cousin sang Ice Ice Baby - Vanilla Ice up to the chorus to my dad, just because my dad didn't say answer the hello's my dad gave. After he finished his chorus, he said "Hello?!" for the final time, and only then my father answered "Hello, Mr Jav please". 1989 too.

Lastly, there are some idiots, I mean people, who are blogging about their net worth. Hello?! What are you trying to prove? That you're rich?! I've seen a few of this 'net worth' posting of bloggers. Sadly, none of them even come close to the net worth at where I stand. Honestly, I do not know my real net worth, but simple calculations indicate that I have a net worth of more than four million ringgit. Read that right! RM4 Million Ringgit!How is that possible?!? If someone gives me RM1 million for my right arm, I will not part with it. Therefore, I know my right arm is worth more than RM1 million. Same goes for my left arm, my left leg and my right leg. That makes RM4 million. Just that alone has already gone over these bloggers' net worth I've read about. Sigh.... people with low net worth.

That's about it to my musings #1.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Baton Passing: Weirdest Behaviour

I've seen this 'baton passing' many times on other people's blog, but I never thought it will come to me. Nevermind that some batons are actually a series of specific questions to be answered, but no... this specific baton ask me to specify my five wierdest habits! That's such an open question! Thank you to HappyLagenda or Legendria for it.

Since my england is getting badder all the time, I've decided to look up the definition of 'habit', and it says: -
a. An unconscious pattern of behavior that is acquired through frequent repetition
b. An established disposition of the mind or character.

Alright then, it's either actions or even mental disposition. Meaning, thinking of KFC all the time can be considered a habit, no? Aish... england already badding, now have to use my brain pulak. Before I start, I will have to say that I DO NOT have a weird habit. It's totally natural to me, only weird to others. So I will write what I think would seem weird to others.

1. I like to remember, advice or apply life and motivation quotes from movies. While most good quotes should come from well-known people like Steven Covey, Theodore Roosevelt, Dr Mahathir or bin Laden, I totally still prefer to bring out quotes from movies or books, such as what I've written in previous posts before. "Freedoommmm.... - Braveheart" Haha.. no lar! Actually it's more to "Don't dwelve on the past, lest you forget to live. - Harry Potter 1" or "I love my life, I love my wife, and I wish you my kind of life. - Jerry Maguire's boss" and others lah, I malas to think of them now!

2. Walking while talking on the handphone. My Executive Chairman also does it, but not the other two directors of my company. My wife hates this habit of mine. Somehow or rather, walking aimlessly while talking on the handphone stimulates nerves and motors, thus pumping more blood to the brain for faster processing of data and making my england badder.

3. Eat, Drink, Eat, Drink, Eat. There are tons of articles and studies saying that one should eat their meal first, and then wash it down with their drink. I have this colleague who only orders food during lunches, and later drinks when she gets back to the office. I cannot! These people must have oily throats for all their food to go down easily. I need my drink to help the peristalsis.

4. Read in the toilet... eh wait, more than 50% of the world population does this. It's not a weird habit. CANCEL.... Again... Singing old nursery rhymes or old catchy songs in my head. Few months ago was "Loo loo, skip to my loo... skip to my loo my darling." Belardy weird song! Last month was "How much is that doggie in the window? woof woof." And last week it was "Kain Pelikat... la.la.la.la", and this week it's "This is the song that doesn't end... yes, it goes on and on my friend.... some people started singing not knowing what it was.... and they'll continue singing it forever just because.... This is the song that doesn't end... yes, it goes on and on my friend... some people started singing not knowing what it was... and they'll continue singing it forever just because... [repeat]". This song is a classic I tell you!! The best song to irritate your parents during a long journey in the car.

5. Lastly, I don't follow instructions. Yes, this is a habit, because I don't follow instructions very often. Be it electrical good's manuals, rules and guidelines of doing something... and even this email. I will NOT send this baton to five persons because I have not seen anyone running the 4x400meters where the runner breaks the baton into five and passing it to five different people. Think about it. Runner one passes to five others. The other five becomes twenty-five. Then the last runners will be 125 people. Just to run in the 4x400, each country would need to send a contingent of 156 runners. Also, the final lap of the 4x400 finals of the olympics will have 500 people running. Cwazee....

So.... this baton will only be passed to one person. Why I chose this person is because she have been hardworking enough to answer all batons passed to her. Not sure if she's done this, coz' if she has, then well, pass it back, I'll find another victim. The person in mind is KookyCookie who will jump with glee and prance around knowing that she gets this baton. She will prance around like the Prancing Whores in her Screw-Dia Cookierarie.

But wait!!! Being the long-winded fella that I am, I'm continuing this post. Gasp! I now will state THREE habits that I do find weird in others.

1. Eating Dhal. No... not Sophie Dahl! I'm sure many of you would love to see someone eating Sophie Dahl, but what I'm talking about is the roti canai and dhal. I have one friend who, after finishing his roti canai, will drink all the leftover dhal from the bowl. On another end of the spectrum, I have one friend who dips only 1mm x 1mm of his cebisan roti canai into his dhal. I can bet that even after eating 50 roti canai, there'll be more than 75% of dhal left.

2. Touching or caressing their shoes. Not many do this at all, but they exist. And usually you can find them at cafe's during lunches, where most business talks happen. What am I trying to say?!? Imagine this (because it really happens!!), two dudes in long-sleeves with ties sitting at the cafe chairs chatting. One dude crosses his legs (guy version of crossing legs please), and one of his hand rests at the sock area of that leg. Slowly, his hands will go towards his shoes, starts to rub it as if it's dirty, and then touch at the bottom of his shoes, not realising what he's doing. Unconsciously, he's CLEANING his shoes! And then he'll bring that same hand to his mouth to pull away some meat between his teeth, or brush his hair. Eeeewww... but hey, it happens!

3. Strangers looking at the food you're eating! This is not a weird habit, but a superbly irritating one! Try eating at any foodcourts in shopping complexes or restaurants, and you'll meet some people who just love staring at the food you ordered. They will stare from the moment the food leaves the waiter's hand, up until you put your first bite into it. Hello! People eating lah. Look somewhere else can or not?! Watchoo lookin'at, foo?! Aku bagi kang! Terajang kang, telanjang!


p/s: Please pray that my england will get gooder.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

The Other Side Of The Interview Table

Today, I was given the priviledge to be an interviewer for potential newcomers to the company. Now, being 26 and having the director making me only other personin the room, interview dudes who are older than me, seems like a cool thing. But then, we're interviewing dudes for post of IT Executive, and since I'm the only guy with IT background, there's nothing to shout about.

So what did I actually learn during this interview?? I have been told to be intelligent and active if I were to go for a job interview. There's this guy who did just that. He's very vocal, giving opinions on questions, and talk a lot about his expertise. Somehow or rather, it turned from a "hmm... this guy is knowledgable" to "err... when will he stop talking?!" to "alright, this is downright irritating!". Okay, first of all, answer an interview question short and sweet and to the point.

Secondly, I learn that you have no choice but to squint your eyes when the sun shines directly into it. My director room's window faces the evening sun. His back is to the window, therefore, you know where the interviewee is facing lar. Poor dude have to squint his eyes during the entire interview that you can mistaken him as a sleep-walker answering questions in his sleep. Of course you don't expect him to say "Sir, can you shut the window?" Okay, this means, do not question the director unless requested to (usually at the end of interviews)

Thirdly, for men, marriage is a bonus. My director (and I, haha!!) thinks that one dude was suitable because he's married, therefore he knows responsibility. Quite bias huh? But I guess that is a bonus point for men!

Fourthly, when interviewee comes, you stay in room. When interviewee leaves, show him to the door. In other words, you're not keen to meet up with the interviewee, but when he does show up and finishes, escort him out! Macam security guard lah pulak.

Fifthly (okay, usually I hear up to thirdly only.... no more than that), most interviewee will clasp their hand in the other hand. This is to avoid shivering due to nervousness. Poor dudes all had their hands shaking. I think either my hands did shake during interviews, or I placed them into my pants pocket. Some will even bite their lips in between waiting for questions.

Sixthly, interviewers are very comfortable with interviewees who answers from the heart, not from the mind. This one dude answered to candidly with broken english and informal words surprises us to a point that we find him sincere. At least we know that there's no 'actor' behind the interviewee. Not easy to achieve this kind of easi-ness with interviewer-interviewee events.

Finally, I learn that we MUST discuss about the interviewee the moment they are done with the interview after we have thrown them out, I mean, showed them the door out. "So, what do you think?" "Boss, I think he forgot to zip his pants." "Really ah?!" "Ya lor, so means he do slipshot work, not complete." :P

Here are a few questions that was in my mind, but it didn't reach my mouth to voice it out. I guess the main reason for me not to bring out the question is to save my own skin.

Q: If our gay director make a move on you, how would you react?

Q: If you meet the director in the toilet peeing, and there's no place for him to pee, will you stop halfway and give him your spot?

Q: On your way in from the main door, you would have seen some of our colleagues. Describe our hottest colleague!

Q: Explain the difference between a server and a waiter.

Q: If our director wants you to write a private and confidential email, but you must not know the meaning of the contents of the email, how would you do it?

Q: Our old IT guy used to press the toothpaste for our directors in the mornings. What brand would you recommend?

Q: Is the sun shining in your eyes?! If you dare, ask my director to shut the blind lah. Dare not? Dare not?!

Q: How many computers did you see on your way in?

Q: Who wrote "Gone With The Winds?"

*sleeps*

Monday, September 12, 2005

How To Avoid A Slick Salesperson

Use lemon to wash off the oil and they won't be slick anymore. :) No seriously there are tons of slick salesperson in this world. The words they use to sell you products are really respectable (at least to me) coz' they're so full of confidence you just have to laugh in your laurels (whatever that is, since I england not good just follow what I have hearing before). Here are various example of salesperson from an innocent one to a bloody, I mean slick salesperson: -

Innocent Salesperson
(After showing the showhouse to the potential customer)
Dude: Sir, what do you think, sir?
Client: It's not bad, really. I'll go home any think about it first.
Dude: Sure, sir. I'll just give you my card, if you have any further question you can call me and I'll assist you further.

Stupid but Honest Salesperson
Dude: Sir, I think it's best that you look around more for other better deal, sir. Ya lah, I don't want later you come and scold me if you find better deal somewhere else. So, please go to that housing project over there, and over there... wait ah, I give you the address. Aiyah, I draw out the roadmap there lah. One thing they have there is that their toilet is nicer, bla bla bla, compared to ours which will flood if it rains, bla bla bla.

Bloody, I mean slick Salesperson
Note: This is the kind of salesperson that have peaced (nicer word for you-know) me off many times. Feel like giving a Level 5 Shin Shou-Ryu-Ken up their ribs.
Dude: .... and that's the whole beauty of the house, sir. Sir, please sit down, sir. So, which bank do you prefer sir? Oh, before that, congratulation sir. This is a wise investment. I will get a banker to talk to you while I fill up your purchase form.

What the *toot*?! Since when did I agree to buy the house?!? Anyway, the continuation of conversation will usually go like this....

Client: Actually, we're just looking around. We need to discuss first.
Dude: Sir, what's there to discuss. This is the best deal around. If you come back next week, you won't get the free electric gate already. Also, they say that the price might increase due to overwhelming demand. For all you know, you'll lose your dream home because all will be bought by then. Do you really want to risk losing your dream home? (look at the son) Adik, adik suka rumah ni kan? (look back at dad) See, your son already look at this as his home, probably already choose what room he wants.
Client: No, it's okay. I will come back.
Dude: Think about it, sir? I'll call the banker for you right now. At least see how this will be a good investment for your family.
Client: Actually, I have a meeting to go to. I'll give you a call if I'm interested. (Tipu only, just wanna go home.)
Dude: Sir, it's 5pm. I'm also leaving already. Perhaps I can follow you to your meeting, then I can discuss with my boss if your meeting colleagues are also interested. (I know you sure tipu to run away, now I wanna follow you, what you want ah?)
Client: It's a private meeting. How can you turn up in a private meeting?
Dude: Sir, I can wait outside until the meeting is over, then we can discuss more. Meanwhile, I get a banker to talk to you, okay?
Client: Bloody idiot!! I say I wanna think about it first, I think about it first lah!!
Dude: Sir, please don't get angry. I'm only trying to help you. I don't want to see you make a mistake by not getting this dream home. Later when you regret, I cannot help already because all the houses sold.
Client: SHIN.... SHOU-RYU-KEN!!
Dude: Arrgghh......
Game Voice: Client Wins. Perfect!!


"But I only want you to buy the house. "


In reality, not many can actually run away from slick salesperson and end up buying a mini-skirt and a tube-top eventhough the client is a guy. So, how do we go about avoiding one? Here are a few methods to try, and I will also put in my usual retord (retort? retard? aish... my england...) against salesperson who comes up and sit at your dinner table.


First Things First: Do not run away!
Do not excuse yourself to get money, get credit card, etc... in summary, do not try to run!
All salesperson know that if you say things like you need to get something to pay for the product, it means you're running away. They WILL follow you! Don't be crazy. Deal with them. If you run, they will chase. This is not really a method. The methods are below.

1. Question them dry
Client: So these vacuum cleaner can suck well? Like that turbo tiger on TV that can suck a bowling ball?? Can I have a bowling ball? Just want to test. What?? You don't have? How can I believe? Get me a bowling ball and then I'll see if what you say is true.

Client: Oh, this credit card free for life? So, even if I don't buy anything I still don't need to pay for the credit card until I die? Really?! Oh... good, can I have that in black and white, with your company's letterhead and director's signature? This is purely for legal purpose because sometimes we cannot just verbally agree. Or else I can say to you now "Can I borrow your wallet for a while? I wanna see how it looks like in the sunlight. If nice I will also buy. So I'll come back afterwards with your wallet, ok?" (info: If the credit card is free for life, it means you either have to spend a certain amout per month to have it really free, OR they will terminate your credit card once it expires. FREE FOR LIFE my belakang-tepi!)

Client: How much can this house be sold next time? Are you sure it'll go up 10% in just one year? Can I have documentations from your developer that their other projects manage to sell 10% extra? Nevermind, just get me latest transacted prices of houses from your developers.

In Summary: Make sure they prove what they say!


2. Shut their mouth
This is wits versus wits. You really need to be fast on your toes on this one. They will sell, and they will push you, you need to defend, defend and then push back and then they will shut up. When they shut up, you can leave (not run). One of the effective method that I have so far noticed having to work well is....

Dude: bla bla bla I'm talking nonsense trying to sell you my product bla bla bla
Client: Nevermind, I'll go home and think about it first.
Dude: Sir, you're making a mistake. If you go home and later want it, there'll be no more. And some more, this price is special only for today.
Client: Last week when my cousin met you, you say the same thing. Aiyah, the price will remain lah. I know. You want me to prove it, I come back tomorrow and ask you the price, want or not? Anyway, still a lot more empty lots, not a problem. If all finished, then tough luck lah. I don't cry over spilled milk.
Dude: Sir, most people when they go home, they end up not buying. Because they think too much of finance problem, and all that negative thing fill up their head. This is a good investment. Don't let your conscience later tell you otherwise.
Client: So, are you trying to tell me that this house is not good enough to win over my careful thoughts and analysis? Then that solves it. No need to think anymore. I don't want it coz' you yourself believe that I will not find it worth it.

Funny example lah... but nevermind. What I'm trying to say here is that if they ever say that you will change your mind if you go home, tell them that it means the product is not really worth it since they have already believed you would change your mind. A good product is a product you will still buy after careful consideration.


3. Be Stupid
Dude:
So, I will call up the banker and prepare the house purchase? Hold on.
Client:
Wah... it's really is a nice house lah. You sure bank will pinjam me ah? I'm not working wor....
Dude: Eh?! Actually no problem sir. Your wife is working right? And I'm sure you work before, so you can show your old payslip.
Client: Sorry, I didn't have payslip. Selling pirated VCD you think got payslip to show ah? My wife also no payslip to show. She works sending student to school in the mornings.
Dude: (Not wanting to lose this client). How about your parents, sir? They can help with downpayment and pay for you until you find a job right?
Client: I'm just waiting for police to give back my VCDs, then I start work again lah. My parents pension already, they not willing to pay for me.
Dude: Sir, the banker wants to speak to you.
Client: Hello? Ah... I want to buy this house. RM200,000. Can you loan me RM300,000 ah? Just put the house at RM300,000 lah. And then I want 100% loan. Need the RM100,000 to buy more movies for my VCD stall lah. Ah?? Actually, I already bankrupt lah. That's why sell VCD. But you banker sure know how to play around with the loan right? Hello? Hello?? Why he hang up ah?!


4. Sell something back
This is the method that I usually use (when I'm alone or just being sickening) if a bloody, I mean slick salesperson just come and sit at my lunch or dinner table without me giving them permission to join me.

Dude: Sir, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, I am sellin.....
Me: Thank goodness it is. I'd surely don't wanna see your face ever again in my lifetime.
Dude: This product wil.....
Me: Will ensure that I will never ever see your face again? Nevermind, no need to buy also I will not see your face.

KIDDING.... no way will I talk like that unless I'm really peaced. :D Here's the real deal....

Dude: Sir, usually in the market price this pen costs RM20, today it's special only RM5 today.
Me: (I use a trusty Kilometrico at 40 cents, so usually I will take out my kilometrico pen and they go. Anyway, let's just say I am not using a kilometrico pen.) Okay....
Dude: And sir, let me show you a demonstration. See, this pen when you write and have some water smudge, the ink don't come off. Bla bla bla sell sell sell bla bla bla sell sell sell.
Me: Okay, why not we do this? I scratch your back, you scratch mine. I'm currently selling Life Insurance for . If you have a minute, let me explain my insurance coverage to you....
Dude: (Thanks me for my time and leaves....)

This works really well coz' insurance costs a whole damn lot more than a pen. I have done this twice and it works.... but please do study a bit about insurance so that you can use it back on them. I have also once try to sell back as a direct-selling person.

Sorry to those I've chased off, but I really don't need to have my peace disturbed when I'm doing what I need to do. If I need to shop, I will shop on my own.

Lastly, to all those who are involved in so-called selling of products for donation, the papers has already covered the issue. In an RM10 product, only about RM1-3 will go to the donation house. RM7 will be taken by the company hired by the donation house. If I need to donate, I'll go on my own, thank you. So.... STOP standing in front of ATM machines trying to stop a good person doing banking transactions!! You think just coz' they take money out of ATM, they want to BUY your product?! And what?? You make them feel like they're evil scum that after taking out RM100, that they don't even part RM10 for the needy,... oops correction, they don't part RM7 to your company?!? If I ever see any of you in front of ATMs again, so help me God, you'll feel the wrath of Shin Shou-Ryu-Ken that you can't even jump up and down Chun-Li like, to squeel Yatta!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Difficulties Of Not Having RM1 Coins

With the government taking back the RM1 coins and using RM1 notes again (back in the 80's), quite a lot of people are going to face difficulty. It will then be a provider vs consumer battle. That is, if service providers do not want to change their 'setting', then consumers will be the ones to suffer. If they do change, it'll be good for all. Here are a few parties who will feel the lack of RM1 coins, in my honest opinion.


Macro, Tesco, Carrefour, Giant and others
I sincerely believe these hypermarts will change their trolley locks (those that you need to put RM1 coins to release from other trolleys). This was not merely to actually lock the trolleys for security. I mean, stealing a trolley at RM1 is very cheap! The RM1 coins is merely a service cost for the workers to pull back the trolley from your car that's parked like 1 kilometres away. Anyway, back to topic, it now seems quite ridiculous to jam in a 50 cents coin into the trolley. Well, we'll see what happens next. For all you know, you'll need to change your RM1 notes for a token (normally used in video arcade centers), put it on the trolley, and later change it back to RM1 notes. I think this is the most cost saving way for these hypermart. But hey, why not... a Tesco token, or Carrefour token, for collection. Orr.... use TouchN'Go.... yea right!


Rapid KL and other related common transportation
I seriously doubt that machines in the busses will change towards something that you can insert a RM1 note into. Therefore it'll just go back down to accepting a coin as high as 50 cents only. Busses will make a longer stop due to double time of loading and more than double time of looking for TWO coins, therefore contributing to longer traffic, and so on and so on. This will be a domino effect to the traffic on the road. Too bad there.


Vending Machines
Not much problems here because before the RM1 coin was introduced, people are already conplaining of having to put in small coins to get a RM1.20 worth cup of Nescafe or Milo. It will just take longer to get your Nescafe, and the vending machine will actually earn less because most people are lazy to carry too many coins, like me! :) Carrying three RM1 coins was simple enough, than having to carry six 50 cents coin. Vending machines earnings will be affected. This will also affect some video arcade machines that hasn't changed to token-type coins.


Parking Meters in Low Yat Plaza
Hahahaha.... I personally singled out Low Yat Plaza because.... I have faced on five different occasions, a parking machine that does not accept ringgit notes! So, I usually have to go to my car, get some RM1 coins and use them instead. So let's see. First hour would be RM2.50 and additional hours are RM2 per hour. If you were to be in Low Yat for 4 hours, you need to pay RM8.50.... and on a machine that does not accept ringgit notes, you need to fork out eight RM1 coins and one 50 cents coin. I have done this on three occasions, the other two occasions I just go back up to their manned counter and have my ticket paid there. Anyway, these machines will be vandalised badly if they don't accept ringgit notes again, and instead ask for seventeen 50 cent coins. Hello?! No weirdo will carry up to seventeen 50 cents coins in their wallet.


Bank Negara
Let's see what Bank Negara will do with the RM1 coins that they will receive. It will add about a hundred or more tonne of 'metal' from the RM1 coins on their premises.


Counterfeiters
If they can easily fake a RM1 coin, they can easily fake other coins as well, but of course it does not justify the cost to fake a 50 cent coins. But what if they do?! Then in the future we'll have 10 cent notes and 5 cent notes too. :D


Question: It's already past 7th December, I still have RM1 coins, what can I do with them?
Good question.... here's a good answer. Several friends of mine have claimed that vending machines in some countries can accept Malaysian RM1 coins as their own 1 dollar coin. And some friends have actually gone to putting the RM1 coin, only to flush it out again. Some machines uses the First In, Last Out way of returning coins, therefore when you put in the RM1 coin, you'll flush out a 1 dollar coin. You can do that. Or.... you can just buy whatever the vending machine sell with your RM1 coins. I will not disclose the countries that accept our RM1 coin. It's up to you to fly around the globe and try it out.


Sidenote: If my grammar or spelling ends up being very atrocious in this post, it's not done on purpose. It just means that my england need repair one.