Thursday, October 27, 2005

How Different People Intepret What's Right And Wrong

SHE is a very famous blogger in Singapore. In the world, she's the top 46th most linked blogger, which can equate her to a celebrity in the blogging world. She is an ambassador for three products brands (now two left, coz' one cancelled her contract). Why is she so famous? My guess is her looks which she enhanced a lot using photoshop, but then again, maybe it's coz' of her spoiltness or maybe coz' of cheekiness. I don't care anyway, I read her blog as a whiny spoilt girl's craziness of the events in her life.

Previously she came to Malaysia, and blogged about how bad Malaysians were to her. Later, she blogged about a couple who took 'her' taxi coz' she was already waiting there. She has as many people who love her and as many people who hate her too. I don't stand anywhere, I'm just a blog reader. I will not introduce who this person is, but time and again she gets attacked by other bloggers for her insensitive postings.

I am attaching a post from her about disabled toilet, which actually led to two Malaysian bloggers (one who's a disabled) to get so angry at her that it became a soap-opera in the blogging world. Suffice to say that this soap-opera got one of the three companies to which she's an ambassador to dis-associate themselves with her. I won't say anymore, just read part of her posting below.

My brother went to the toilet, and he said that he was behind walking behind this man who also wanted to use the loo.

The man stopped at the handicapped toilet instead of the normal male toilet, because well...
1) it is nearer afterall
2) maybe he shares my love for handicapped toilets because they are so freaking spacious and usually has your own mirror and wash basin! Coolness!

He was really damn fucking suay coz he pulled open the toilet door, and, believe it or not, there was really a handicapped person inside.A male handicapped person, who was using the toilet.

I don't know what the fuck is this person's problem, but he shouted at the innocent man who opened his door: "You come inside here for what, you are not even handicapped!" and etc scoldings.

Woah, woah! HOLD ON DUDE. You mean only handicapped people can use handicapped toilets?

Didi was smiling away and telling his story as if it is very funny (which it is lar, if your point is to laugh at that suay man), but I was really quite pissed off because this is the second time I heard a story about handicapped people scolding others for using their toilets.

Another one was my friend who was using a cineleisure handicapped toilet... When he walked out, he was severely lectured by a man who was wheel-chair bound, the latter chiding him for making him (latter) wait.

I don't know if it is the same grumpy, crazy person who did these two scoldings, but if it is not, then it seems a little too much of a coincidence.When I expressed that this siao-eh (as an individual) was ridiculously unreasonable, my brother said, "No, the man shouldn't have used the handicapped toilet what, it says on the door that it is for the handicapped."

How come people have this notion that only the disabled can use facilities for the disabled?

*Roll eyes*

So tell me ... our government spent millions of taxpayers' money to build so many facilities for the physically disabled, and only they are allowed to use it?Oh, excuse me for going down the slope instead of the stairs, will you? I shouldn't have. MRT lifts - don't use it, cannot use it. Use the escalator instead.

WTF is this?

Sure, if I SEE that you are physically disabled, and you need to use the handicapped toilet, then yes, obviously I will let you use it and go use a normal toilet.But the man my brother saw didn't even know there was a person inside! And if you didn't lock your own bloody door, it's your problem and stop scolding others for your freaking mistake!

As far as I am concerned, you have a physical disability - and that is where you have a disadvantage. Your bladder is working fine isn't it? So you wait, just like normal people do, when there is a queue for the toilet. The rest of us queue up to use a toilet - I don't see why the disabled should be any different.

Pissed with unreasonable people. What pisses me off more is when the society at large condones bad behavior when it comes from supposedly piteous people. So what, handicapped have the rights to be unreasonable meh?

If I ever break my leg (choy!) I think I shall use my crutch to anyhow whack anyone who comes near my MRT lift. When some person says I am being violent, I cry and say he is bullying a cripple, then everyone will automatically be on my side.

Friday, October 21, 2005

A Colleague's Mentality

Side note: "As her soul rises to the heavens, misty dews and rain droplets accompany to soften her journey. The rakyat mourns a compassionate and charismatic mother. A great lady finally home." - Tribute to Datin Seri Endon Mahmood

I reached work at 7:30am this morning because I need to get ready for a meeting at 9:00am. Met a senior colleague telling me that my boss has asked our accountant to brief him on the renewal of a tenant. A few minutes later, this accountant colleague came to me. Conversation went like this....

Colleague: I came to work this morning, there was a note on my desk, saying that Mr Boss wants me to brief him on TenantName's renewal.
Me: Shouldn't be a problem what. Just check the tenant file lah.
Colleague: He (the boss) is longer here what. The tenant also masuk before I came here. Why I have to brief him?
Me: He just wants to know the details lah.
Colleague: He knows where the filing cabinet is what. Check himself lah!

What a way to respond to a director's order. Hehe.... this director has just got himself involved with our work since the past month, of course he's not up to date with tenancy information bla bla bla. That's why he asks for update, knowing very well he wouldn't know where to look in the 50-odd pages of the Tenancy Agreement. I think what my director ask is totally normal, why must my colleague act up?

It's like the boss saying, "Secretary, please make me a cup of coffee." and the secretary replying "You got hands and can walk what, go make yourself lah." I think it's too common that in the white-collar industry, we do not work according to the terms in the contract. Surely we'll have to do odd-jobs for directors. If we were to reply "Eh, you siao ah?! My contract didn't say I need to be involved in preparation of Annual Dinner. Go find someone else.", that's the end of the job.

Sigh... sometimes unwritten terms in contracts really make a person seems to be underpaid. :)

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Age Goes Up, Memory Goes Down

I just came back from helping a 65+ years old tenant with some issues on his work. A work that could take about 5 minutes to help complete took half an hour due to missing of papers and items that was just being used by him this morning. They appear to be anywhere, from under the phone, to under the desk, to accidentally putting it in a bag. I'm not complaining, but I dare not think about myself in the future being in the same position.

I'd probably start with forgetting where I put my glasses while it's already on my face. I hope until the day I die, my mind will still be not so bad in where I place things. While I am forgetful now, especially on tasks I'm supposed to do, I don't want to face misplacing something I kept just 2 minutes ago.

Hope all of you will have good memories even in old age.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Earliest To Work Ever

Disregarding special events and work trips that I had to make in the past, this is the earliest I've ever been to work on a normal office scheduled day. My previous jobs all required me to reach the office by 10:30am, 8:30am, 9:00am, 8:30am and 9:00am respectively. So today I clocked in at 6:57am, which is usually the time I am just waking up. Due to some circumstances at home, I have to be at work this early. My usual time to reach work will be anywhere between 45 minutes before to being late up to 15 minutes. Haha...

I work on the 5th floor of the building along with two other staff. Level 4 is the main office with about six staff. I've heard from a Level 4 staff that when he used to stay back past 8pm, there was always 'somebody' walking about the office, opening doors and closing doors but no one to be seen. Office haunting is rather common in Malaysia, with another story at a friend's place whereby at a certain time, water will drip out of the water cooler. That company's workforce also leaves before the water start dripping out.

Back to the story. Nature calls, not the waterfall type, but the volcano type. So, took the toilet key and headed to the male toilet. Of course I was already aware about stories of toilet haunts, but by 7am, come on, I don't think I'll face anything. And to cut the story short, I really didn't face anything except hearing water taps turning on on the floor above me... err... should be below me actually since above me is an empty floor. Hehe... now that's scary to think about it again, since the sound came from the top. Aih.. nevermind.

So, what can I do two hours before work officially start? Well, work! Completed some work and stuff, and also blog this thing. Only complain I have is that all office buildings in Malaysia have their own preset aircond hours, and until 8:30am when the cool air will start blowing in, I'd have to be contented fanning myself with a flyer. They should really put a standing fan in here. Sweating. :(

It's gonna be a hectic morning today, cannot afford to smell sweaty meeting belardy important potential clients. In Back To The Future 2, Michael J. Fox.... oops, Marty McFly went to the future and had this suit which can dry him when wet. I'm sure that suit can fan him when he's sweating too. Now, what year was that?? Can't wait for that suit to be in the market. :D

Monday, October 17, 2005

No Motivation To Work Today

For some unknown reason (sure got reason wan lah, except haven't found out yet), I'm rather lazy to do any work today, though I know I must. Feeling tired yes, but it's not a physical tired, it's more towards the lack of motivation leading to this tiredness. So, let's analyse why I am actually not in the mood to do any work today.

Several reasons that I can think of are: -
i) Monday Blues - I hardly get Monday blues. Monday is a good time to start working to finish up what I can until the weekend. Unless of course, there's something that I did not complete doing during the weekend that made me not want to start Monday. What could it be?! Perhaps two chores that I know I did not complete, which are cleaning of two rooms and searching through clothes I've kept in bags.

ii) Incomplete Work - Uncomplete or incomplete?! This is a quite common thing I face sometimes. The more work that I have yet to complete, the more I don't feel like doing any work because I don't know where to start first. Let's see. Do I have uncompleted work? Yes, four of them. Actually five. One will take about 5 minutes (editing and faxing). One about 20 minutes (call, and another call). The other three also will take 10 minutes top. So, well, then I guess it's not that, since I don't have a problem to start anyone of them, provided the motivation comes.

iii) Raya Approaching - Today is the 13th day of fasting, and that's another 17 days to go. I know some people are already in the celebration mood, but I don't think I am there yet. Would be about 10 days to go before I'd be in the mood, since by that time it'll be 7 days before raya.

iv) Tired due to Fasting - Ya, right! It's only 11am.

v) Disturbed Peace - Nothing in the news is that horrible today to affect me today. Driving to work is also non-eventful.

vi) Boredom - Hmm... I think this is it. There's no great event that's gonna happen at work today. Tomorrow there will be, but not today. Therefore since today's work will only take about 1-2 hours of my time (plus another 1-2 hours of self-empowerment to do some extra work for the company), I can afford to delay starting any work. Just hope the delay won't bring to contentment of relaxing that I end up not doing any work at all.

Sigh.... low productivity day today.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Different Meaning Of Life To Different Culture

As a reminder, I have worked in a semi-government company, in a project situated in a village in Kedah, and in a commission based company, and corporate company. What I have experienced in terms of people there is interesting.

People here are a happy bunch. There's way too much slack time when there's not really a project being undertaken. As long as there's delivery of work, the workers can practically do whatever they wish (within the boundary of appointment letter). Similar to government workers, they can take some time off to smoke, have a drink at the cafe, chit chat with colleagues at their cubicles, etc. Most departments are quite laid-back, while some departments are always on their toes at all times, where they don't really get to slack much at all and occasionally have to stay back everyday (for about a week).

The government benefits bestowed upon them is good. Pay is only satisfactory or below satisfactory, but workers utilise the benefit fully. The strength of this type of company is the family-environment within departments. The weakness, one of the reason that made me not want to continue, is the "laid-back culture". At 40 years old, yes, I'd like that, but not at 24 at that time.

Flexible working demand, average to low salary, most are in satisfied level (that can lead to complacency or loss of drive on life). Travelling within Malaysia is a norm. Travelling overseas is a luxury. Prefers cafe or economical food. Fast food is acceptable. Restaurant eating is a luxury (as compared to Accenture / Ernst & Young that finds is a norm). Hardly ever go to Starbucks or Coffee Bean.

Village People
No, not the group that sang YMCA! Working in a village, be it in a government sector (ministry of agriculture), or own business of paddy fields and fish/prawn rearing, life is simple. Average income is RM400 - 600, from admin staff to accounts executive. Works according to government hours, start work at 7am and leaves by 4pm. Paddy field farmers, according to how many relung they own gets about RM8,000 - RM20,000 per half year (that's as little as RM1,300 to quite a lot at RM3,300 per month!!), usually a family business, so the per month salary is further divided by at least 2 person. Works from 8am to 12pm for four months, and from morning till evenings for two months, and repeat.

Strong family-type amongst colleague, and very strong family bond for farmers. Pushes children to finish up to SPM and then work, or to STPM and then work. Pushes children to get a stable job with the government. Usually difficult to obtain job in corporate sectors due to not having strong command of the english language. Nevertheless, entire families are a happy bunch.

Long after-office hours for family, low pay, most are in happy level. Travelling within Malaysia is acceptable, usually just travel nearby on motorcycle. Travelling overseas is a luxury (and usually not needed other than going to Makkah). Eating at home is a norm. Eating out (be it kedai kopi) is expensive. Fast food is a luxury. Restaurants and hotels is ridiculously luxurious
(and they don't even have the feeling to do so.) Basically, their needs is very very simple. Will NOT touch Starbucks or Coffee Bean.

Commission Based
Most start-up workers are young people between the age of 18 - 25. Due to it being commission based and no or a salary as low as RM400 per month, most only buy motorcycles. Fast food is a luxury, usually will eat economic rice or skip lunch totally, to eat at home after work. Unhappy lots unless they're hardworking and even hardworking ones needs to have the skill to sell.

Average, not sad and not happy, but always worrisome people. Low pay, hoping for commission, therefore hoping for sale. Usually between unsatisfied people, due to constant rejections to selling. Just an example, how would you feel like having to walk from one factory to one factory hoping to sell cartons of Uncle Toby's to their boss to give their workers? As mentioned, prefers to eat at home. Practically wants to save as much money as possible. Due to the non-constant salary, during good commission, usually throws away the commission celebrating or buying something expensive. Vicious cycle of unhappiness and happiness.

Corporate Sector
NO slacking! If you're required to work 8 hours, you WORK 8 hours. Being monitored silently by bosses, and those who don't perform are transferred around the company, to initiate a decrease in motivation to make the person quit on his/her own.

The only place with worker's burn-out, and the ones totally making full use of their annual leave and MCs. From executive levels and below (not managers and above), 30% are satisfied, 50% are unsatisfied, and 20% are always checking "careers" section in the newspaper on a constant basis. The company ranges from small IT company of 5 people, to a huge corporation like Price Waterhouse Coopers.

Workers generally hit above RM1,800 salary mark. Looks forward to weekends to partaayyy... or go out socially with friends, or stay home play Playstation 2 which is affordable (for single people). Sundays to rest to be healthy to face another week. During weekdays, the house is practically a hotel, to go home, eat dinner, do some homework, sleep and stary work again.

Mostly unsatisfied lot. Average to good salary (but only compared to non-corporate, but if compared against work load, it's average to bad salary). Travelling within malaysia is a norm. Travelling overseas is semi-luxury (nearby can lah). Fast food is a norm. Restaurants is a norm for BIG 5 company workers, who can afford Delifrance and Dome quite often, but for non BIG 5, restaurants are acceptable. Starbucks and Coffee Bean is also acceptable or a norm. Eating at home is a luxury!! Haha... serious! With the time left after work, there's hardly time to prepare and cook, unless it's maggi mee or nasi goreng, or rice and one dish.

In summary
Life is on a scale balance. It's USUALLY emotions vs workload vs salary. Workload little, salary little, emotion okay to happy. Workload a lot, salary a lot, emotions not happy to okay. Workload a lot, salary little, emotions sad.

The KEY to workload a lot, salary a lot and happiness a lot is to be really hardworking. That's why workaholics enjoy their work, and usually end up in managerial positions and later have lots of money. Rich Workaholics = Donald Trump & Bill Gates. Rich Workaholic who really prefer to be at work than home = Hugh Hefner. Workaholic who knows when to have fun = Richard Branson. These people are either hardworking, or have courage to initiate things they believe in, which 95% of the world population does not have.

Personally, for me, I cannot be hardworking for 7 hours (minus lunch) in a day. MAX total hardworking-ness is 3 hours in the morning. After lunch, no mood liao.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

About Taxis

Since I started driving, I hardly ever take the cab to anywhere. Yesterday was my first trip in a cab (for a few years already) and I took the chance to question the driver on things I've been wondering about.

First of all, I asked about the looong queue for gas at Petronas that I always see. According to the driver, the gas is 60-70% cheaper as compared to petrol. A cab's full tank will take about RM50 worth, but gas will only cost about RM18. However, a cab's full tank can last for an entire day (520km) but you cannot fill up the gas to maximum capacity of the tank due to danger of expansion of the tank (from the gas heating up). So, it's a 4-time gas fill-up per day at RM4-5 per fill up, that lasts 130km.

Questioning him on whether it's a waste of time lining up. Seems that it's usually about a half-hour waiting in line for gas, to which he said at least it gives him some rest. Ookayy then, two hours per day on lining up is okay for him. But really, the save in fuel cost is what made him keep to gas.

I also inquired about the 'rental' of taxis. All taxi drivers RENT the taxis from taxi company on a daily basis. Some companies allow for 'rent and buy' which means, they will pay rental for the taxi and in five years, the taxi will be theirs. The problem is, while the vehicle will belong to them, they cannot use it as a taxi. It will be converted to a normal car, and if they still want to be taxi drivers, they will need to rent another taxi.

"Rent and buy", though it sounds good, is really not good at all. It's about RM44 per day, but maintenance of vehicle is up to the driver (ie tyre change, engine check) and they will need to pay the rent every single day of the year. This means that if they take leave for Hari Raya for 10 days, they need to pay RM440 in that 10 days.

"Pure Rental" is aboutRM65 per day, and they only pay on days they use the taxi. Maintenance is borne by the company. The driver I was with yesterday believe that pure rental is more cost saving, and I think so too.

So, a taxi driver starts the day on a full gas (not full lah, but maximum gas capacity) and rental of RM65. If the driver starts at 8am, he would probably break-even (on the rental) within 4-6 hours, depending on the distance and traffic. In traffic, the money move slowly, but it moves! Just to tell you all that there is cost incurred for 'time' and not only distance, and I believe this is fair to the taxi drivers, though it may not seem fair for the passengers.

Okay, let's say he gets break-even at 3pm (additional hour is due to waiting for gas twice). Then he'll need to break even his gas of RM18 which can be done in 1-2 hours. So as bad as it goat worst, a taxi driver will start earning at 5pm! That's like... err... you work from 8am to 5pm only to break-even, and then the next four hours, if they're lucky they will earn RM40 to bring home. According to this taxi driver, he generally break-even at 1pm, and by 2pm he will purely drive to earn money. At the end of the day at 9pm, he would take home anywhere between RM30 (bad day) to RM120 (good day). Putting that into average calculation, he can take home RM75 daily, which brings to RM1,500 per month working from 8am to 9pm.

Life of a taxi driver.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Bloody Political Idiots

I don't generally write on politics, but when I read craps that shows the weakness of a political system, I just have to vent it out. To children, a politician goes into politics in the first place to help the rakyat. In reality, some (not most) of them go into politics to close more business deals and sama-sama makan.

In the news today (12th Oct 2005)
1. 50 years old man in Johor grazed one of three motorcycles carrying 5 youth. At a traffic light, they attacked him, and ran away with his car keys, 3 credit cards and RM200 worth of cash.

2. A boyfriend left his girlfriend in the car at Juru R&R to go to the toilet, two men went into the car, drove off, picked up a third and raped her in the car only to leave her at Sungai Petani.

In the news today also....
Cabinet fighting over usage of "Jabatan" and "jabatan".

Utter nonsense!! Furthermore, 2006 budget gives a lot of advantages to businesses and police workforce. Why reward the police when criminals are getting braver? Doesn't it show that the police are slacking?!

Gone are the days when robbers struck only at night, or kidnappers waiting at secluded area before pouncing on their victim. Crime is done in broad daylight. I myself am not comfortable with taking out Kit Kat bar from a grocery store, and here we have brave criminals doing it in public!! Hello?! Something wrong with the Malaysia system?! Someone's gotta revamp the entire country's system.

Let's hope Najib will use his knowledge as Minister of Defense and create something to defend the rakyat from internal criminals, not only foreign attacks.

As for now, rakyat will have to fend for the rakyat, and even that is not happening. Pity the rakyat, but F**K YOU rakyat too! Arseholes who just turn a blind eye to crimes in front of their eyes. Come on rakyat, just do a Con Air. If you have to hurt or even kill to save someone's life, sanity or life-time emotional peace, you have my full support.

Makes me feel like running for Prime Minister. Hahaha.... I'll be the first to get killed in a hush hush operation by unhappy 'big powers'. As I have always believe since Std 5. There is REALLY NO JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD. It's just a word to hide the truth.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Planes Of Existence

My Opinion Entirely....

Imagine four pieces of transparency, and we print the letters A to D on different sheets. Now imagine we place one piece of white paper with a stickman drawing facing upwards. Lastly, we place transparency A (T-A) on top of the white paper, and transparencies B to D below the white paper.

The stick man in the figure is you.
T-A = Real World
T-B = Spirit World
T-C = Djinn World
T-D = Other planes (may be more)

Nearly all of us are currently at the position of the paper mentioned above. We can only see the real world. Spirit world can see its own world and the real world. Other planes of existence can see some other planes, but not necessarily in alphabetial order. For all we know, the Djinns cannot see the spirit world, but can only see its own world and the real world. And, some spirits in the spirit world cannot see other spirits in their own world. Other planes is purely subjective and I will not discuss them.

What I'd like to discuss is this. The travelling mechanism to a different plane of existence lies within individuals. Why is it that someone on the death bed can start talking to 'people' we can't see? Why does someone in a coma and being resuscitated can actually see him/herself being revived on the operation table? Why is it that someone driving on a deserted road in Sungai Limau in Kedah can stop at a night market to purchase some food, only to return home and the food is actually leaves, and the night market ceases to exist? How can we really say that someone who can see things we can't as 'insane' and should belong in a mental hospital?

God created four main 'objects' in the human body, which are i) soul ii) mind iii) brain and iv) body. The soul is connected to the body and the mind to the brain. To me, the brain's main function is to delegate tasks to the successful running of the body, and to stimulate thinking. The mind is what stores information we see, and may think on its own. When the soul exits the body, (there is still some linkage from the soul to body), but the mind and the brain works very well together still. People in coma can have great brain activitiy due to what's the soul experiences outside the body. Anyway, this paragraph will be discussed in a new post. The only gist I wish to take out from this paragraph is the power of the mind (not the brain).

Okay, back to topic. The mind, during extreme fatigue or malfunction can drop the soul into another plane of existence. That's when we see shadows, movements or voices that generally should not be there. This happens unconsciously. How about consciously. Why are there psychics, why are there bomohs, and how about voodoo witches?! I have absolutely no answer to harm-causing magicks, but as to their ability to converse with the other world, I still put it to their mental ability. Their mind. Belief and faith are the fuel to a mind's ability. In the real world, we can easily see that faith led to the creation of the light bulb. Faith and belief too brings an individual to experience things that the common man (who don't have enough faith or belief) can't.

People with telekinesis (ability to move objects with the mind) has 100% belief that the objects can be moved. If we can put as much faith and belief that we can make that pencil move, as MUCH belief as we have about pushing it with our fingers, then it will move. But billions of people cannot do it due to that doubt. As long as there's doubt, "aiyah, where can one!??" then it won't happen. The power of the mind. We can follow the steps of that ghost show "Candyman", on total darkness with only one candle, look into a huge mirror and say candyman three times. If you are bloody scared enough while doing it (amazing where you find the courage to actually do it huh?!) then you will experience something. If you are doing it with ridicule, nothing will happen. Fear also contributes to the fuel of planes travelling.

There is a thing called sleep paralysis. It usually means that you are awake, but you can't move. Most people who complains of "a ghost sitting on my chest when I awake" would probably experience sleep paralysis than really a ghost sitting on their chest. Believe it or not, if you have a mirror on the ceiling, you'll see yourself with your eyes closed. Your soul and mind are awake, but not your body. You can look right, look left, you feel like you're turning your neck, but your head is not moving. The ONLY thing you can make your body do, is to breath strongly. That's the only difference you can change in your body during sleep paralysis. You can feel as if you're moving your fingers, but your real body is not moving at all. This is the first step or highest level in the spirit world (in which you won't see other spirits).

Should you experience sleep paralysis, do not panic. Ya, right!! Most people WILL panic waking up and not being able to move. If you can sooth yourself, relax and enjoy the moment. Try moving your hand to your face, you will feel yourself moving your hand, but your hand won't reach your face. Nothing you do physically will reflect in what you see. Then, try to 'float' out of your body. Don't worry, you won't die. But that's easy for me to say, huh?? Since fear will trapy you in. What you will feel is like an electricity flowing through your entire body, before you will float out. If you do float out, you will hover on above your body, slowly turn and you will automatically look down to your body. At this stage, you can experiment moving about the room. At an advanced stage, you can travel outside your room, outside your house, practically, anywhere. But remember, there is always a Law of Nature that prevents you from doing something you know at heart is not a good thing to do. Therefore, you will not be able to peep on someone taking a bath. Share with me if you have experience out of body.

If you have never experienced sleep paralysis, and would like to try it, go to bed at night, free of stress and fully calm. Lie on your back and with only the sounds of your breathing, tell yourself that your body will fall asleep, but not you. You will slowly enter this dream-like situation, something similar to those times you are dreaming and you KNOW you are dreaming. Then you'll wake up, but really, it's your soul only waking up, not your body. Then go through that electricity feeling. Me? I've been in tons of sleep paralysis, both by accident and created, and have faced the electricity feeling (more like semut-semut / buzzing feeling on entire body), but it's not a common thing to feel myself floating out, and fear will pull me back. :P Means, I've never truly floated out. :-(

Good luck.

p/s: A little bit out of topic. Crap. Am supposed to relate to cases of others who gone to the djinn world and spirit world (with being able to see spirits). Ended up talking on how to achieve high-level spirit world entrance. May or may not restart the topic in times to come.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Being Civilised Is A Losing Battle

The topic was mentioned in a phone conversation I had with an old friend of mine. I think it'll be alright to repeat the story here since no one will know who he is anyway. It's a scary world to be in when, in a secured environment, you get yourself into an event that crumbles your entire trust on the so-called secured environment.

Anyway, I will tell the story directly what happened to him, to show how some management are purely interested in keeping a place calm and happy-looking, no matter what the cause. I usually will filter names of places or people in my blog, but today's post, I will filter only to a certain degree as you will see.

In respect to the establishment of this so called secured and friendly environment, I will not disclose to you that it happened in Suria KLCC. My friend, a guy dude in long-sleeve and tie was out to lunch with his girlfriend, also dressed in working attire. Moving into their path are three punkie looking teenagers (say about 16 - 19 years old) and just as they were about to pass each other, one kid extended his arm to touch my the girl's breast. There was no contact, but they laughed once they have passed by.

My friend got pissed, well, who wouldn't be?! He turned around and asked the kids to apologize. One of them (leader I suppose) challenged him to a duel outside. So begins a battle of words, with the other kids joining in saying "Don't you try to find trouble with us". As typical in Malaysia, which I hate, everyone else is just ignoring what is going on and going about their own business. The kids suddenly backed off, but my friend was not satisfied that they didn't apologizse.

What made the kids back off and head the other way is because the security guard is coming from behind my friend. In hoping that the security guard saw what happened and maybe apprehend or take some actions against the kids, he (the guard) instead held tight to my friend's shoulders and said "Don't find trouble here!". I can imagine my friend's feeling when he heard this. All sense of security, all walls to protect the innocent just crumble. My friend instead lashed out at the guard about what happened and typical for someone who don't want to be blamed, answered "Oh, I didn't see anything. I just noticed you shouting, so I thought you're causing trouble."

Ended up seeing the security manager. Under law, the intention to molest is punishable by the court. This is a serious issue, and if you readers think that it's childish to report such thing to the management, imagine if it happened to your girlfriend or wife (for male readers) or happened to you (for female readers). So, the security manager, whose main intention is to keep a calm and peaceful environment, just took down reports (which we know will go into the dustbin anyway) and left it at that.

When my friend inquired about the security cameras, so that they can appropriately apprehend the kids, this so called multi-million dollar shopping complex which I will again, not disclose to you all that it's Suria KLCC, does not have proper security camera zonings. From the horses mouth, he mentioned that some of the cameras are static, and does will not cover every inch, or even meters of the shopping complex.

There you have it folks, a beautiful illusion of security, until it is breached. And peace is to be enforced, without regards to who's wrong or who's right, just as long as there's peace and quiet. Hope this will not happen to any of you.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

I am a psychopath

One of the most famous 'baton-passing' theme is the "I am" theme, which practically requires the blogger to write a series of "I am...." to somesort of a confession to anyone in praticular. Most will start an "I am" from young until their current age, in which they will confess things they do to their parents, bla bla bla. Some examples I've seen are like: -

I am the girl who locked you in the toilet in Std 4.

I am the man who left you for another woman.

.... and some craps like that. I will not write anything like that about myself, but it brings to a very interesting idea. Since tomorrow is the first day of fasting month, I will now release all the demons of insanity and morbid-ity(?!) from my mind, muahahaaha..... I banish you from my mind for a few months! Oh yeah, selamat berpuasa to all.

Beware: The following confessions are very graphical in nature and very grotesque. Those under 18 please seek your guardian's or watson's advice. Please seriously obey this advice for your own good.

For friends who know me personally, who knows the cheerful and friendly personality that I have,.... well, I have absolutely no idea how you will take the following conjurations of my mind. Just be thankful its not real. :P

I am the brother who bit off your hamster's head after watching 'V', laughing and running off to the mirror to see blood oozing out from my mouth and the hamster's head still throbbing on my tongue. I am the brother who then spat the head at you and used the hamster's body as a paintbrush to paint a beautiful red dress on your art block. I am the brother who sat on your head, and made you lick that wet 'paint', and said "Yummy, it's delicious".

I am the child who found it humourous stepping on young yellow chicks, to hear the sweet sound of crunching bones, giggling out loud as I chase more of them around. I am the child who picked up each and every crushed chick and poured their blood on unhatched eggs in the coop. I am the child who also poured leftover chicks' blood into chilli sauces' bottles at home. I am the child who gladly poured the chilli sauce for grandma and grandpa eating their chicken.

I am the son who smashed your car windows with a tennis racket. I am the son who placed broken pieces of glass in your shoes and loafers and smiled with glee at you jumping in pain and falling over the fence and broke your arm. I am the son who, while you were in the hospital, played campfire with all the papers I found in your briefcase. I am the son who was so happy when you got fired and stayed home with us for a few months. I am the son who slashed your tyres when you got a new job. I am the son who got to know a good friend of yours, a magician who can make people disappear.

I am the teenager who spat and blew my nose in your burger bun when you complained that the burger is not warm enough. I am the teenager who added my pee to your soda when you asked for a refill. I am the teenager who, with my friends, pushed, kicked, slammed and robbed you off your wallet and car after your dinner. I am the teenager who left you with a small token of gratitude by leaving a kitchen knife sticking out your thigh. I am the teenager who after that vanished like ninjas, being trained well by the magician.

I am the young man who tried to steal the exam papers for my finals, but was caught by you. I am the young man who sneaked into your office after the finals and burned all the answer sheets. I am the young man who dumped eight dead dogs into your yard for revenge. I am the young man who was not satisfied and proceeded to hit your ailing parents during their morning walk. I am the young man who drove over them again and again until I could not see anymore through my tears of laughter.

I am the man who applied for a job at your company but was given a low pay. I am the man who sent your clients to those who are worthy. I am the man who sold your contacts and information to earn what I am suppose to get, you worthless piece of rubbish! I am the man who paid girls to give you a call to your home to your wife. I am the man who got you tied up with a girl who eventually dumped you after your divorce. I am the man who ruined your marriage, just as you deserved. I am the man who made sure you don't remarry when I had my friends castrate you while you were so drunk, trying to escape anguish and depression . I am the man who mailed your your dried up testicles, pierced with rusted screws. I am the man who will never be humiliated by you ever again.

I am the boyfriend whom you decided to cheat on, just two months into the relationship. I am the boyfriend who made your lover disappear. I am the boyfriend who fed you soup, with the meat and personal parts of your lover. I am the boyfriend who convinced your parents that you had a sudden urge to go overseas looking for a job. I am the boyfriend who instead kept you locked in my home, to do to you as I wish. I am the boyfriend who kept my promise that I will not rape you in captive, or have anyone do that to you, but I never said I will not mutilate you. I am the boyfriend who carved your cheeks so that your teeth shows without opening your mouth. I am the boyfriend who bought a drum, but no drum sticks, and guess where I got those drum sticks from, you armless hag! I am the boyfriend who ensured your symmetry by also removing your legs, leaving you looking like a thin turtle. I am the boyfriend who got tired of you, who brought you to a lake in town, and watching in awe at how you try to swim with just limbs to your elbow and knees, until you sank and never come up for air again. I am the boyfriend, who celebrate your watery grave by scattering the bones of your lover, after my friends and I dined deliciously on his entire tasty meat.

I am the convict who tried to bit your nose off, how dare you try to cuff me! I am the convict who sang the national anthem in court when asked for my plea. I am the convict who struggled and manage to sink my knee deep into the stomache of that woman, and why was she wearing that maternity dress for?! I am the convict who laughed and laughed in captive until I am declared an insane and do not belong in prison. I am the convict who managed to fool all of you into thinking that I'm insane when I'm totally sane, with only lust for the dark. I am the convict whose destiny was set, to live in utter fascination with vices, sins and evil.

I am a psychopath, without empathy or remorse in what I do.