Monday, October 19, 2009

Off The Cuff

I'm really blowing my own horn here, but I've just came to realize that I'm able to write stories off the cuff (definition: impromptu). In fact, when I think about it again, most of my stories in this blog are impromptu, just that it didn't occur to me until a friend asked me to review her story.

I'm a reader who prefers one or two emotional situations per chapters in books I read. From suspense to romance, or from horror to elation, etc, in one chapter. However, the chapter my friend asked me to review, was from suspense to serenity to suspense to serenity. I'd prefer to have it split into two chapters. To show her an example of extreme change of story atmosphere (and genre), I wrote the following back to her within 5 minutes of reading her story.

I do notice that while my mind works for stories (actually, it's not original, but plagiarism or based on other stories I've read my entire life), my grammar gets worse as I write faster. Anyway, enjoy the extreme Chapter.

A burly men stepped through the door and shoved Peter down to the floor. “You asshole!”, Peter exclaimed. It’s been a while since he last saw his brother. “How ya’ doin’, kiddo?”, Michael picked him up from the floor. Looking at each other’s face, Peter smiled, his brother didn’t change at all. In fact, he’s not moving, just transfixed.

Just then Peter realized blood oozing from his brother’s neckline. Then his body slipped away, replaced by a tall man in black costume holding a ninja blade behind him. “Oh my god, my ex-wife’s uncle found me!”, Peter trembled in fear. “I told you never to mess with my niece! You stole her recipe, left her and opened this restaurant under your name! Now, face the consequences.”

As the man approached, he slipped on a banana peel and fell backward. The ninja blade flew into the air and landed into the table, breaking the plate of spaghetti and landed the tip of the blade protruding between two meatballs. “My, that’s a humongous dick replica”, thought Peter. The man, having fell and hitting his head hard on the floor, fainted. Just then, Peter had a nasty thought. He have been finding this man quite attractive since he married his ex-wife.

Peter crept down to the man, checking for a pulse. Yes, he’s still alive of course. Then he slapped the man a few times, seems he’s really out of it. The zippers started being undone, and then off comes the pants. Peter’s heart beats fast as he pulled down the boxers and started to place his lips on the man’s member.

The enjoyment lasted a while, but then Peter heard sounds from the toilet a few paces behind him. “Who’s that?”, he thought. He stopped his activity and proceeded to the toilet, thinking that another attempt to kill him drew near. As he entered one cubicle, he heard a flush in the other. Then he turned to see the other cubicle, and a laughter ringed in the room. He was just about to run out when something moved in the mirror. He glanced at it, and sees himself, with blood spattered on his face, fangs and black eyes staring back at him. Behind his horrible mirror-image, he saw a woman in white.

“Oh my god! Mother!”, Peter shrieked! He turned around, but his no one was there, but the image in the mirror stilled. It moved towards Peter and he could feel a cold touch to his shoulder. “Peter, the Cube of Veta Sigma must be saved! The aliens will arrive tomorrow night, and you need to meet Mr J. Just to go the corner donut shop and ask for Lou Bega. He will show you the way. Go now! For the sake of humanity, Peter. Go now!”

The image disappeared as Peter left the toilet.

Friday, April 03, 2009

The Saviour and the Condemned

A calm river. Bodies out of the water does not linger anywhere near the river, as they are busy with their lives. Bodies in the water, are those who are deemed lost in life.

A boat is seen; a lone figure crouching at the side looking into the river. At times, he reaches his hands into the river and pulls a body out. The Saviour.

Beneath the boat, a body, not as lifeless as the rest, seems to follow the boat's flow. The Saviour has realised this since long ago.

He realised that some bodies are difficult to pull out, while others are easy. The easy ones, he knows, is being pushed from beneath the water by the awakened body; The Condemned.

Many times he tries to grab the hands of the Condemned to pull out, and that many times the Condemned pulls his hand away, but does not try to pull the Saviour with him. The Condemned has accepted who he is, what he is, but does not accept others around him being like him.

Who is the Condemned? I am.

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Why I Think An Auto-Biography Is Important

I'm not sure about other people out there, but for me, I'd really like to know how my parents grew up, and what made them what they are today. For me, it is not easy to just approach my dad and ask him, "When did u hit the important career moment?" or "What were your interest in school?" and things like that, because our relationship has established itself to be more of a barrier-ed father-son relationship that's open only for adult talk, and not personal talk.

For me, an auto-biography should be written at every milestone in life, similar to the milestones I've written in previous posts. That is, to write about your youth and education life when you start working... and date it. Meaning, the topic can be "Javalier: 1970 - 1990. Written 4th Jan 1992, completed 24th Feb 1992." Nothing wrong with that, maybe when you reach 45, you'd look back at the post and you can add comments, and also date that comment, so that you can see how things have changed in perspective of age. Never ever edit again when that chapter is completed.

After your first kid is 10 years old (not another chapter at marriage, as you'd have too little to write about). At this time, you can talk a bit about your career, what you faced, what you did right and wrong, what you think you should have done otherwise, and also include your marriage talk, your relationships, etc, as well as "where and when" of important events especially for the understanding of your children. Still, the story should still center yourself.

When am I going to start writing my own? I'm not sure. All I know is it should be a one straight off, no need to draft and re-drafting. I'm not trying to market myself, I just want a summary of my life.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

2008 Review

A quick review gives me this for 2008....

Career - Better.
There are lots more things to learn and experience as compared to my job in 2007.

Finance - Better.
With the new career of 2008, and further tightening and monitoring of expenditure, there are more savings this year.

Health - Worse.
The new job of 2008, as well as personal experiences are still causing a lot of pressure and stress, which does lead to more asthmatic counts.

Happiness - Same.
As compared to 2007, where there are some happiness and some sadness, this year, there are a lot of happiness and a lot of sadness, so it still remains the same on the scale.

Intelligence - Same.
Though I've been exploring methods and manners to at least view a sense of intelligence improvements, I don't have any proof of any increment.

Emotions - Worse.
2008 sees me slowly losing grip of my proudest emotion: patience. I'm less patience and have more temperament.

Family - Undisclosed.

Knowledge - Better.
Of course. If a whole year goes by and there are no new knowledge acquired, something must be totally wrong with me.

Ambition - Worse.
There have been no movement on my ambition. Therefore, with the rising age, and non-moving ambition, I deem it worse for 2008.

Ethics - Same.
Work and personal ethics remain the same.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Connection to Fate

In this world, in your life, on your way to fulfilling your destiny, there are....

One who brought you into the world
One who shows you the world
One who picks you up when you fall
One who ensures you don't get up
One who motivates you on your path
One who stops you from your dream
One who gives you hope, when you stop
One who stops you, when you move
One who makes you soar wildly
One who keeps you grounded to reality
One who remains a friend, though far
One who remains an enemy, always near
One who straighten your winding path
One who creates crossroads in your motion
One who gives you the knowledge you need
One who modifies it into wisdom for your usage
One who takes it back, for you are not ready
One who deletes the knowledge you already have

In all of the above, one or several individuals constitutes the 'One'. He/She may be of a different person at different times in your life.

Remember though, that none of the above are negative. There are reasons to why they are who they are to you. The only person who can bring negativity, besides evil itself, is you, the

One who has the power to decide.

With the guidance and effect of the collective "One"s, may your destiny be fulfilled.

The above, albeit not at all complete, is inspired by each and every life that has touched my existence.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Anger Management: Revisited & Children Emotional Education

I feel the need to talk about my anger management. Subconsciously, my anger management is controlled by 3 things.

1. My respect for Mahatma Gandhi's life of pure tolerance, peace and patience.
2. Prophet Jesus's (pbuh) claimed quote of "If anyone slaps on your cheek, show him your other cheek too."

I'm not a saint. The two above only constitute less than half of what controls my anger. The 3rd thing that controls my anger is...

3. My amusement of what anger can do to a person, and how much energy and time can be wasted by just feeling angry.

In psychology, my main interest is in emotional psychology, as I've written in a previous post titled "Test". Growing up, it was very interesting to note how unscrupulous drivers can cause my mum and dad to be so affected that they only talk about how careless the driver is for at least a half hour long, while we know the driver does not even have a five second thoughts of my mum and dad. I've also seen my friend, MG chased a car who cuts right in front of him for a whole 30km just to cut that driver again. I don't see the benefit in this.

I've written also maybe two years ago that, being angry to a person is like being in love. That person takes a huge amount of your mind at that time, and energy is spent on thinking of vengeance or "what I would have done differently if I can turn back time." Frankly, sincerely, truthfully, I think I have made a great advancement on my own personal anger management. When a person gets angry at you, they want you to get angry too. We do realise that if the other person doesn't get angry, or just say "whatever", it makes you just more angry, right? I enjoy doing that, sorry to say. I don't say "whatever", but I just drop it. No sense in getting affected.

This had led to me being termed by a good friend, AS, that I have an emotional switch I can just turn on and off. Maybe I do, maybe I don't. All I know is that when someone gets angry at me, or try to provoke an anger in me, there would be an instantenous evaluation of the situation on whether it's even worth a cent in me being affected. If it doesn't, then I don't give a damn.

A simple situation is this morning whereby a cashier chided me for not telling my orders properly. So what? I just paid and left. Within two steps walking away from the counter, all thoughts of the cashier left my memory.

I just failed to realise something though. When I'm alone, I can do that. When I'm with others who knows me, that's when there is a different variable that comes into play. If my son sees me getting scolded for an honest mistake, and I walk away, what kind of impact will that create? Will that say "Oh, we must just not care about anger." or "My dad's a coward." or whatever it is.

What I know is that when someone gets angry at my loved ones in the past, yes, I get affected because my position is as a protector. But when it's directed at me alone, I just lift up my simple anti-emotion shield and move on. Surely, when people get angry at me, and my loved ones are nearby, they would feel affected, and this is one thing that I failed to realise and would now need to formulate a better 'dealing with the situation' should it arise again.

I give myself and you readers this situation. Imagine you're walking with your parents, and you tripped over a wire that a workman lays across the floor of a shopping mall, and the plug comes out of the socket. Before you could cuss (or whatever it is you do when these things happen), and find someone to blame, a workman who was drilling a small hole into the wall suddenly snaps at you. "Hoi! Blind ah?" and he proceed to walk to the plug, put it back in and as we walks back to his stairs, he gives you an angry glance. What is your reaction?

If I'm alone, yes, I'd just walk away. No sense in putting sense into someone who's already stupid enough not to tape the wire securely to the floor. Again, I'm not a saint. A saint would go to the management and tell them the danger of the wire that may trip a much elder person, etc etc. Now, besides the above, wouldn't you start getting angry and say "What blind?! You're the one who didn't secure the wire properly. What if my mother step over it??" bla bla bla, and shouting ensues, etc etc,... 10 minutes later, you fumed off, the workman continues his work in anger.

Two hours later you're still fuming. At home, the dinner table topic is about a stupid workman. Next day at work, the breakfast topic is about the stupid workman.

In the end, how does this benefit you? You traded time and energy for anger, and you didn't get a single cent from 'loving' this workman. I'd rather use my mind to think of so many other stuff than just anger to a workman.

But that's just me. I guess the new formula now would be to pretend anger and scold the person, and continue to throw anger blows at each hurtful comment, just for the fun of it. Seriously, that would be fun. Ok then, that's my new formula.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

My Current Danger In Life: December 2008

I Talk, But I Don't Do. When I Do, I Do Out Of Desperation, Not Out Of Choice. May This Change.